Threats and Missed Opportunities

Spankings involving superheroes and superheroines, non-superhero comic-book stuff, comic strips, jungle girls, Lara Croft, Vampirella, Elvira, etc. Chross' board already has an excellent thread on this, but we love this subject so much we figure it deserves its own forum here anyway.
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Missed Opportunities - Prize Comics

Post by web-ed »

Prize Comics didn't feature enough spankings (we admit we're a little demanding on that score), so as usual let's bitch and moan by pointing out where they could have done better.

Let's start with Black Magic #38 (May-June 1958), whose antecedents were clearly the Horror/Suspense titles that were so popular in the early 50's. This title appears to have survived the massacre that occurred after the Comics Code was implemented and distributors were failing (c. 1955-56), perhaps because it was less extreme than many other books (even the words "terror" and "horror" were forbidden by the Code, which killed popular EC titles like The Vault of Horror. Nice art by Joe Orlando, who drew no known spankings but did give us Dumb Bunny in some nice spankable poses in early stories of the Inferior Five . (A great pity, since an Orlando spanking would have been a good one!)
Black Magic #38, cover art by Joe Orlando
Black Magic #38, cover art by Joe Orlando
black_magic_no_38_cover.jpg (111.77 KiB) Viewed 12211 times
"I told you time and time again - stay away from that mirror!" lectures the boyfriend as his girl is getting sucked into what is presumably another dimension. He's losing her (literally), so obviously, he was unfamiliar with the Chicago Spanking Review protocol for hanging on to your girlfriend:

Step 1: explain once to your girlfriend why something is too dangerous for her and she mustn't do it;
Step 2: If she fails to heed your warning, administer a stern lecture on why what she did was wrong (very important), then SPANK HER to drive the point home!

If our young man had only done that, he wouldn't now be watching his girl disappear through some weird portal. Of course, he could have put this dangerous, life-threatening mirror in the attic where no one could get to it, but that's not as good a solution because I can't see how it could have led to a spanking!

Next, let's switch to romance comics, which became enormously popular in the 50's and featured a number of spankings. Here we see a story called "My Sister's Sweetheart" from Young Romance #69.
Young Romance #69 (May 1954).  Art is uncredited, but see text.
Young Romance #69 (May 1954). Art is uncredited, but see text.
young_romance_no_69_p27.jpg (279.65 KiB) Viewed 12211 times
I must admit there's nothing really blatant on this page, but I still think the younger sister, Jill, could have benefited from a little OTK discipline now and then. I wanted to post it because of the obvious boo-boo - Harold, speaking to Jill in panel 2, addresses her as "Sue" (her older sister's name) by mistake! Also, this artwork reminds me very much of John Romita Sr. who of course later found fame as Marvel's Art Director and as the artist who took over The Amazing Spider-Man after Steve Ditko left the strip.

Could it be Romita? He had been happy at Atlas (Marvel), but by 1954 Atlas was hanging on by a thread and it was around this time that he was forced to switch over to DC where he spent years doing romance comics (which he hated, by the way). It seems quite possible, then, that Romita found some work at Prize Comics (possibly through Joe Simon and Jack Kirby) just before, during, or even after he transitioned over to DC. I've spent this much time on the question because I like Romita's art very much, and think he's somewhat underrated by comics critics.

In any case, the next issue of Young Romance did have a M/F spanking, although not a very good one, and it will be added to Comics Gallery 2 in due course.

Now let's move on to the Crime genre, so loathed by Fredric Wertham (to him, everything was a "crime comic"). Artistically, I don't care for the genre either, because it's emotionally tiring to spend so much time around utterly worthless characters. This may be why I never liked television crime shows like The Untouchables or more recently, The Sopranos either. Unlike Wertham, however, I don't believe that they corrupted America's youth - my big complaint is that despite their popularity (before being wiped out by the Comics Code), they had zero (known) spankings! [No longer true - I found one after this was posted.] And there was no excuse for this, because they featured plenty of bad girls who needed some strict punishment. Here's an example, from Headline Comics #26:
Cover of Headline Comics #26 (September-October 1947).
Cover of Headline Comics #26 (September-October 1947).
headline_comics_no_26_cover.jpg (115.41 KiB) Viewed 12211 times
Bad girls who stick guns in people's ribs (and smoke cigarettes, too - tsk, tsk!) deserve a sound spanking!

Up to now, I may have been stretching the definition of "missed opportunities" just a little, if by that we mean situations where obviously spanking was the only way to go and yet the story followed a different path. But this time, spanking really was the only way to go! Once again, we have that old staple, the arrogant queen (who in this case has even usurped the throne). Yet when confronted by our hero, all he does is grab her and hold her in a pose which immediately suggest the OTK position! Yes, they really missed the boat here in Price Comics #3 (May 1940):
Prize Comics #3.  Don't just seize that bad Queen, Power - spank her, for goodness sake!
Prize Comics #3. Don't just seize that bad Queen, Power - spank her, for goodness sake!
prize_comics_no_3_power_seizes_queen_wodo.jpg (304.47 KiB) Viewed 12211 times
O.K., I've complained enough for one day. Until next time...
Last edited by web-ed on Sat Aug 06, 2011 9:30 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Reason: Correct boyfriend's name!
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Re: Threats and Missed Opportunities

Post by Tanner »

The Phantom would have known how to handle Queen Wodo! Imagine how much a spanking would have stung on that tightfitting shorts-like costume she is wearing.
She'd have trouble sitting down on the throne she usurped, real poetic justice.
Spanking, whether its involves scheming femme fatales,spoiled brats, female criminals,arrogant nobility and high society ladies or reckless superheroines, is always the proper way to dish out just desserts.
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Re: Threats and Missed Opportunities

Post by jimc »

yes such a pity that there are so many females placed in the right costume, position and circumstances that a good otk spanking would just be called for or even expected from the audience and was not delivered. Great finds and commentary as always web-ed. Thanks again for your time and commitment to CSR from a grateful fan. Have a great day.
Jim
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Missed Opportunities and Sexual References in Star Publicati

Post by web-ed »

Star Publications has two known spankings, both from Popular Teen-Agers and both already posted in Comics Gallery 2 (here and here). My recent search through its available books revealed no new spankings, but I did uncover an unbelievable treasure-trove of sexual references. Some of these also represent missed spanking opportunities, so let's begin with one of them, from Popular Teen-Agers #5 (September 1950, 5 issues prior to the first spanking):
The Brat Race - winner should have gotten spanked!
The Brat Race - winner should have gotten spanked!
popular_teenagers_no_5_brat.jpg (135.99 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
No spanking here, but the title, "The Brat Race", certainly suggested potential. Also suggestive are the names of two characters we see on this page, the eponymous Toni Gay (whose name was changed from Toni Gayle) and her boyfriend, Butch Dykeman. We're going to see some more of these two, and any doubt that these names were chosen innocently will be removed, but first let's detour and take a quick look at another jungle scene:
Jungle Adventures #10, Harem Horror
Jungle Adventures #10, Harem Horror
jungle_adventures_no_10_harem.jpg (309 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
No spanking, alas, but get a load of these outfits - if Rulah's standard White Goddess bikini isn't titillating enough for you, the other girl is wearing an open vest with no bra! A little suggestive for the day, although no one complained (except maybe Fredric Wertham).

Now let's meet Honey Bunn, whose last name is a fanny-reference or my name isn't Web-Ed. Like Toni, Honey went through a name change during her time at Star, in fact two of them, from Ginger Snapp to Ginger Bunn to Honey Bunn.
Here she is in the same issue that gave us "The Brat Race", Popular Teen-Agers #5:
Ginger Bunn - two n's for twin buttocks!
Ginger Bunn - two n's for twin buttocks!
popular_teenagers_no_5_ginger_bunn.jpg (148.16 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
Now, Honey seems to have had some, er, interests that lead me to believe she needed to get some counseling post-haste; namely, compensating for her penis envy, dressing up like a boy, hanging around in the boys' locker room, and even dressing and showering there where someone was bound to notice her! Let's gratify her exhibitionistic tendencies by taking a look at School-Day Romances #4:
Honey Bunn (still calling herself Ginger Snapp) seems to be doing something about her penis-envy.
Honey Bunn (still calling herself Ginger Snapp) seems to be doing something about her penis-envy.
school-day_romances_no_4_honey_bunn_spear.jpg (161.03 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
The writer here seems to have read too much Sigmund Freud. I never believed in penis envy myself, but Honey sure seems to be trying to compensate for not having one. I'm not sure what to make of her jabbing Lefty in the behind with that spear, or maybe I just don't want to know. By the way, Honey, you've got your thing pointed the wrong way.


The next time we see Honey, she's "disguising" herself as a boy so she can join the football team:
Yes, Honey, that's exactly how guys look...
Yes, Honey, that's exactly how guys look...
school-day romances_no_2_honey_bunn_in_locker_room.jpg (159.49 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
Don't know how to break this to you, Honey, but your "disguise" isn't going to fool anyone. And she's drawn with her arms behind her head, which thrusts her maidenly bosom out provocatively - does she really think she's going to get away with this masquerade?

After practice, she heads for the locker room and undresses, telling herself she can get showered before the rest of the team arrives and catches her in the buff. This is so clearly a case of self-delusion and repressed exhibitionism that it isn't even funny - or maybe it is.
She gets caught in the shower, just as part of her must have secretly wanted to.
She gets caught in the shower, just as part of her must have secretly wanted to.
school-day romances_no_2_honey_bunn_in_shower.jpg (481.27 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
When the coach enters the locker room to discuss a new play with "Gordon", Honey quickly dons her uniform and heads back into the shower. The coach is a little suspicious, but seems to buy her incredible excuse that she catches cold easily. Coach apparently needed some training in how to recognize the signs of a deeply disturbed student and when to call in the counseling department. By the way, the "HIS" monogram on the towel was an interesting touch - back in my day, we didn't need "HIS" and "HERS" monograms on our towels because we actually dressed in a different locker room than the girls! I guess we were just behind the times.


When spring came around, Honey traded in her football jersey for - no, not ballet slippers - baseball cleats! And of course, she changes right in the boys locker room again. This time, some rude Rodney kicks her in the behind - of course a full initiation (with paddles) would have been preferable.
Honey Bunn gets kicked in her bunns.  Strangely, no one noticed her until then.
Honey Bunn gets kicked in her bunns. Strangely, no one noticed her until then.
popular_teenagers_no_6_honey_bunn_locker_kick.jpg (345.04 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
Did all those guys really not notice a girl changing clothes right in front of them, or were they just pretending not to notice?

Believe it or not, things go downhill from there. On the baseball diamond, Honey needs to borrow a bat when it's her turn at the plate:
Got wood?
Got wood?
popular_teenagers_no_6_honey_bunn_got_wood.jpg (79.12 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
At least she didn't say, "Anyone got wood?" And if you're not convinced this was pure innuendo, take a look at the next panel:
10 guys holding their bats erect.  Nothing suggestive in that.
10 guys holding their bats erect. Nothing suggestive in that.
popular_teenagers_no_6_honey_bunn_bats_erect.jpg (181.85 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
O.K., there's at least 10 guys there with their "bats" erect - no way this was not intended as a sexual reference - no way!


But wait - there's still more to come in this same issue (Popular Teen-Agers #6)! You remember our old pals, Toni Gay and Butch Dykeman? Let's take a look at them as they try to improve their posture (!?) by taking up horseback riding:
They're sore - is it from a long day in the saddle or because they got spanked?
They're sore - is it from a long day in the saddle or because they got spanked?
popular_teenagers_no_6_posture_lastpage.jpg (343.96 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
I'm not going into the plot, but as you can see there were a lot of confused goings-on, and both of their fathers seem to be threatening them with spankings. In the last two panels, they appear to be rubbing sore bottoms - is this from spending too much time in the saddle or did their dads carry out their spanking threats?

You may have wondered why Toni and Butch were trying to improve their posture. Here's why - at their schools, the Venus School of Modeling and the Adonis School of Dramatic Arts, their joint Gym teacher said they needed to improve their posture. Of course, he phrased it a little differently:
Straighten up, people!  Still from Popular Teen-Agers #6.
Straighten up, people! Still from Popular Teen-Agers #6.
popular_teenagers_no_6_straighten_up.jpg (321.16 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
"Straighten up, Miss Gay! Straighten up, Dykeman!" No way this is innocent - NO WAY! Especially when you remember that Toni's name used to be "Gayle" before someone changed it and Dykeman's first name is "Butch". [Postscript: after I found this, I realized I'd seen it somewhere before. Turns out that was on superdickery.com, for anyone who may be interested.]

I can't resist enlarging (sorry!) one panel:
The greatest line ever uttered in a comic book!
The greatest line ever uttered in a comic book!
popular_teenagers_no_6_straighten_up_dykeman!.jpg (309.79 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
This is my new all-time favorite line of dialogue in a comic-book: "Straighten up, Dykeman!"

Now let's see how well Coach's admonition took hold. From the very next issue of Popular Teen-Agers:
The handsome Mr. Kirkland just doesn't do it for Butch.
The handsome Mr. Kirkland just doesn't do it for Butch.
popular_teenagers_no7_not_butchs_type.jpg (353.48 KiB) Viewed 12177 times
When Toni remarks on how handsome the instructor, Mr. Kirkland, is Butch responds, "Frankly, he doesn't register on my meter." I guess Mr. Kirkland just isn't Butch's type - apparently he prefers tall, blond guys.

Several thoughts now cross my mind. First, we're lucky the letterer didn't succumb to temptation and change one letter so the word balloon read "peter" instead of "meter". Second, it doesn't seem that our friend Butch paid too much attention to what Coach told him in the previous issue. Third, Toni better not count on Butch if she wants to have children.


I think you'll have to agree that Star Publications bears looking into further. Even with the issues seen here and the two spanking ones, less than half the issues of Popular Teen-Agers are available, and right now I think I'd swap my entire Claremont-Byrne run of X-Men (which I never really liked anyway) for the complete run of this title. It won't be easy to find any of the missing issues, or of the other titles in the line, but there's no doubt that it's worth making the attempt.

"Straighten up, Dykeman!" :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Missed Opportunities in St. John

Post by web-ed »

Plenty of bad girls in St. John Publications, yet none of them got spanked (actually, one of them probably did, but not among the available pages). Let's begin with a real show-off:
A Spectacular winter scene.
A Spectacular winter scene.
spectacular_adventures_no2_page23.jpg (186.82 KiB) Viewed 12142 times
It's not that I don't like bikinis, but I really don't think they're appropriate attire for downhill skiing. Amazingly, no one in this story remarked on that fact! A girl who dresses like this is just too fond of showing her body off, and deserves a good spanking! Of course, she's in danger of frostbite as well, and I know just how to warm her up...

Let's all go to a party...
What a Swell Party This Is!
What a Swell Party This Is!
teen-age_romances_no34_cover.jpg (42.68 KiB) Viewed 12142 times
"No one knew what these fast-living, thrill-seeking teenagers were doing...!" the cover blurb breathlessly informs us. So what exactly were they doing? Well, I see two couples talking, one dancing, and one rather chaste-looking kiss. No sex, drugs, or booze anywhere - that's fast living? The girl in the orange skirt does deserve a spanking though, for throwing her guests' coats over the bannister, which looks sloppy.

O.K., this next girl really does need some correction:
Love For Sale...
Love For Sale...
lucy_no_4_cover.jpg (165.33 KiB) Viewed 12142 times
Turning her school letter into a "$" does make her look just a little cheap, and in an era when Cole Porter's song "Love For Sale" still generated controversy, there's only one way to deal with her...

Our next title seemed promising ...
Love In Bondage - but no spanking.
Love In Bondage - but no spanking.
first_love_illustrated_no_45_p27.jpg (66.89 KiB) Viewed 12142 times
... but it's not that kind of bondage. Same thing as with Somerset Maugham's great novel Of Human Bondage - the bondage is figurative, not literal. Of course, with our luck, if they had put some real bondage in this issue, they'd probably have left out the spanking anyway, and for us, bondage without spanking is like bacon without eggs, or something like that.

Canteen Kate often featured Matt Baker's art, and may have been created by Baker since Kate is reminiscent of his Sky Girl. It did provide some welcome relief in the middle of the intense war scenes in Fighting Marines, but it didn't have any spankings or even as many "assume the position" poses as did Sky Girl. I did find this one, which I feel duty-bound to share with you now:
Canteen Kate Cleans Up
Canteen Kate Cleans Up
fighting_marines_vol1_no8_canteen_kate.jpg (101.1 KiB) Viewed 12142 times
Finally, let's "Meet Miss Pepper". She almost gets spanked here, but not quite. She does take a nice slapstick whack on the butt, though:
Miss Pepper unwisely faces away from that trap door.
Miss Pepper unwisely faces away from that trap door.
meet_miss_pepper_no_6_p12.jpg (130.41 KiB) Viewed 12142 times
Miss Pepper is unwise enough to bend over, but the firm whack she receives will remind her to be more careful next time.

Miss Pepper is a pretty school teacher. In our last example, she has wrongly punished two boys in her class by making them write lines on the blackboard. She feels terribly guilty and offers to make amends. The boys feel she should receive the same punishment that she wrongfully inflicted upon them, which seems fair:
It's only fair you receive the same punishment as your students, Miss Pepper...
It's only fair you receive the same punishment as your students, Miss Pepper...
meet_miss_pepper_no_5_page14.jpg (233.88 KiB) Viewed 12142 times
Of course, if I'd been scripting this issue, it would have gone a little differently. She would have inflicted corporal punishment on the students, which means that after she discovered her mistake, there would be only one way to make up for it: "You'll get three swats from each of us, Miss Pepper. Bend over, please, and grip the edge of the desk. Look straight ahead..." :D
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Missed Opportunities in Story, Toby, Fox, and Fiction House

Post by web-ed »

Let's start with Story. Bottoms Up would seem a promising title, but then this is a horror comic...
Bottoms Up!  Oh - it's not what I thought...
Bottoms Up! Oh - it's not what I thought...
story_comics_mysterious_adventures_no_ 18_page11.jpg (144.89 KiB) Viewed 12122 times
I don't think I'm even going to waste any more time searching through these. I've always detested Horror comics, and no spankings have ever been found in them. It just wouldn't fit in well with what these stories are trying to accomplish (and whatever that is, it isn't good).

Another promising title turned up in Toby-Minoan's Monty Hall of the Marines - "The Swat Parade". Now, that's more like it! It's a war comic, and there have been two good spankings in this genre. Furthermore, this title has some pin-up girls in every issue - let's take a peek:
Pin-up girl Floretta the Florist.  Let's show her how much we care by setting up a paddle-line!
Pin-up girl Floretta the Florist. Let's show her how much we care by setting up a paddle-line!
monty_hall_of_the_marines_no_11_floretta.jpg (165.34 KiB) Viewed 12122 times
"Swat Parade" - you can't go wrong with a title like that - can you?
"Swat Parade" - you can't go wrong with a title like that - can you?
monty_hall_of_the_marines no_11_swatparade.jpg (116.59 KiB) Viewed 12122 times
To me, "The Swat Parade" suggest a paddle-line being formed, perhaps for Floretta. But there were no spankings, so even after reading the story I have no idea what that title was supposed to mean.

Let's switch from tanks to horses and take a look at Lariat Lucy, from Western Drime-Busters #10 (Trojan Publishing).
"Flaming Justice" is what these bad girls need!
"Flaming Justice" is what these bad girls need!
trojan_western_crime_busters_no10_lariat_lucy.jpg (275.37 KiB) Viewed 12122 times
"Flaming Justice" it says. Would it be too much to ask that some of that "flaming justice" be applied to Lucy's backside? Apparently it would, for there was no hint of a spanking here, pardnuh.

More from Trojan: this time, it's Dan Turner, Hollywood Detective from Crime-Smashers #2.
Sexy costume, hands-and-knees position, bullwhip - but no spanking!  Crime-Smashers #2.
Sexy costume, hands-and-knees position, bullwhip - but no spanking! Crime-Smashers #2.
trojan_crime_smashers_no_2_pg08.jpg (94.7 KiB) Viewed 12122 times
I don't like whips at all, because they're inaccurate and severe, but if you're going to show one in use, and the "spankee's" bottom is turned up anyway, why not apply it where it will do the most good? Another missed opportunity. That Jimmy Olsen wannabe running into the scene would probably have messed things up, anyway.

Three times we've seen a bad girl throw a knife at a hero, and each time she's gotten spanked for it, as well she should. So what's the problem with Fight Comics #36? Captain Wimpo there just shoves the knife-thrower aside and never gets around to spanking her. How will she ever learn proper manners that way?
Fight Comics #36 (Fiction House).  This may be the only time a bad girl threw her knife and didn't get spanked.
Fight Comics #36 (Fiction House). This may be the only time a bad girl threw her knife and didn't get spanked.
fiction_house_fight_comics_no_36_page29.jpg (137.2 KiB) Viewed 12122 times
Lastly, we come to perhaps the biggest missed opportunity ever. This is the cover of Fox's My Love Life #12. Look at these story titles: "I Asked for Trouble" (my answer is spanking) and "I Was An Untamed Filly" (I know exactly how to tame you, my dear). If that weren't enough, look at that brat sashaying her hips, just daring us to spank her!
My Love Life #12.  She's practically begging for a spanking!
My Love Life #12. She's practically begging for a spanking!
fox_my_love_life_no_12_cover.jpg (80.07 KiB) Viewed 12122 times
"Sure, I'm a flirt. So what?" She's just begging for a spanking - in fact, she's actually daring us to spank her. Well, we dare, all right, but that lazy, good-for-nothing couch potato there apparently couldn't be bothered. Somebody really should rewrite this issue. Bring back Romance Comics (with spankings in them)!
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Re: Threats and Missed Opportunities

Post by overbarrel49 »

hi web-ed,

these and others like them seemed for a long time to be the story of my life. i can remember getting all fired up watching an old movie when a spanking was obviously needed or when one seemed imminent only to get let down when none happened..................sigh. those last 2 were really frustrating :x . what is the matter with those people........................especially with titles like that last one................geez! thanks for posting these, phil
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Missed Opportunities - Canadian Comics

Post by web-ed »

With my search almost completed, I found no spankings in Canadian comics, which flourished briefly during World War II, but they had a few missed opportunities.

First up: this scene from Grand Slam #54, which takes place in a south seas school house. The schoolmarm is wearing a bra and a grass skirt, a good outfit in which to receive school corporal punishment (or even administer it to that good-looking girl in the front row), but alas there was none.
Grand Slam Comics #54.  Red Rover, Red Rover, Bend Over, Bend Over
Grand Slam Comics #54. Red Rover, Red Rover, Bend Over, Bend Over
grandslam_54_35.jpg (516.95 KiB) Viewed 12051 times
Next we have My Secret Marriage #8. This Good Time Gal is in love with herself, doesn't help her sister around the house, and jerks her boyfriend around:
Good Time Gal - needed a good time spanking to help her grow up.
Good Time Gal - needed a good time spanking to help her grow up.
my_secret_marriage_08_good_time_gal.jpg (91.9 KiB) Viewed 12051 times
He even says that she's a spoiled brat:
"I think you're nothing but a spoiled brat!"  So why didn't you do anything about it, guy!
"I think you're nothing but a spoiled brat!" So why didn't you do anything about it, guy!
my_secret_marriage_08_spoiled_brat_panels.jpg (135.65 KiB) Viewed 12051 times
But he was all talk and no action - a classic wasted opportunity. This is exactly the kind of plot that has led to a spanking in other comics.

Lastly, from My Secret Story #27. A girl has lost her way (we forget the details) and wound up in trouble with the law. The judge sees that she's not really a bad girl, and he doesn't want to send her to prison with hardened criminals, so what can he do?
My Secret Story #27.  The judge has a tough decision to make, but we know what we'd do.
My Secret Story #27. The judge has a tough decision to make, but we know what we'd do.
my_secret_story_no_27(can)p10.jpg (76.38 KiB) Viewed 12051 times
Here's my slightly altered version to indicate the sentence I would impose if I were that judge:
We altered the dialogue slightly to indicate my preferred form of punishment.
We altered the dialogue slightly to indicate my preferred form of punishment.
my_secret_story_no_27(can)p10_altered.jpg (114 KiB) Viewed 12051 times
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Spring Cleaning Out the M/M Junk

Post by web-ed »

Properly speaking, this post does not belong here, because it is neither a spanking threat nor a missed opportunity. It probably belongs on superdickery.com (maybe I'll forward it over there). But with the end of the Great Golden Age Search drawing near, I'm in the mood for some spring cleaning, and what I most want to clean out is the remaining M/M junk from my files! Four spankings will be posted on April Fool's Day, two more still need to be inserted into the Comics Spanking Data Base, and then there's this bizarre little item, taken from Fawcett's Wow Comics #41 (February 1946).

Ever since the days of Fredric Wertham, superheroes with teen-age sidekicks have been suspected of being gay. Of course, if you're a grown man palling around with a teen-age boy, you can take steps to mitigate these nasty suspicions. For one thing, do not do this:
Dance Marathon of Death!  Mr. Scarlet should either have dressed differently or avoided dancing with a boy also wearing a "flamboyant" costume.
Dance Marathon of Death! Mr. Scarlet should either have dressed differently or avoided dancing with a boy also wearing a "flamboyant" costume.
wow _no_41_dance_marathon.jpg (96.97 KiB) Viewed 12038 times
This story was called "Dance Marathon of Death" and Mr. Scarlet dancing with Pinky was intended symbolically by the artist and writer, whoever they were. However, this kind of symbolism could easily be mistaken to have another meaning when your characters are called "Mr. Scarlet" and "Pinky", and the two together referred to as "The Crimson Crusaders"! Something a little less, well, flaming, would have helped.

How could these guys not know the implications?
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More Spring Cleaning - Some Genuine Missed Opportunities

Post by web-ed »

O.K., let's finish up our spring cleaning with some M/F stuff!
My spring cleaning.  Maybe I shouldn't have waited so long.
My spring cleaning. Maybe I shouldn't have waited so long.
web_eds_spring_cleaning.jpg (144.62 KiB) Viewed 12022 times
When a girl can't seem to obey a "No Hunting" sign, what would you do?
No Hunting, but there should have been plenty of spanking.  From Diary Loves #11.
No Hunting, but there should have been plenty of spanking. From Diary Loves #11.
diary_loves_no_011_nohunting.jpg (121.08 KiB) Viewed 12022 times
If you answered "spank her" you're absolutely correct. Why this guy didn't is beyond me.

Next comes one of the worst examples of a blown opportunity ever. The story's title is actually "Spoiled Brat"! I mean, how could they waste a chance like this?
The title says it all:  Spoiled Brat!  From Diary Loves #16.
The title says it all: Spoiled Brat! From Diary Loves #16.
diary_loves_no_16_spoiled_brat.jpg (108.33 KiB) Viewed 12022 times
It's hard to believe, but it got even worse as our brat throws a temper tantrum and strikes the guy with a tree branch:
She has the gall to hit him with this branch.  Time to trim it into a switch and put it to work!
She has the gall to hit him with this branch. Time to trim it into a switch and put it to work!
diary_loves_no_16_switch.jpg (99.64 KiB) Viewed 12022 times
There was only one thing to do: take out your pocket knife, cut this branch down into a switch, and then apply it where it was obviously needed! But El Wimpo here doesn't do that; somehow the brat gets tamed by the story's end anyway, but I don't really believe it.
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Missed Opportunities in Lois Lane

Post by web-ed »

The Lois Lane Spanking Letters, which among other things detailed the case for spanking Lois, was just posted yesterday. Today I obtained a copy of Lois Lane #56 (April 1965), which provides even more justification for taking Lois OTK. Here's the very first page, showing us "The Snoopiest Girl in History":
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Lois breaks into some scientist's laboratory, only to find a stern-looking Superman barring her way. But did he administer an object lesson she wouldn't soon forget? No! The result was that Lois goes back into time and (I'm not making this up) opens Pandora's box!

Later that same issue, Superman once again concludes he needs to teach Lois a lesson (and Lana, too). And once again, instead of the quick, effective, and humane method of spanking, he elects instead to rig an elaborate masquerade, pretending to be someone called "Ideal-Man"!
Image

Two very interesting things about that last panel:
1. The final caption asks a question only to answer it. "Did Superman's 'lesson' do the girls much good? Evidently not!" And what conclusion should be drawn from this, we ask? That Superman should have used sterner methods.
2. Kurt Schaffenberger drew Lois and Lana with their right hands in such a position that they could be rubbing their sore behinds! Was this Schaffenberger's way of commenting on the story, implying that it would have been much better had there been a double-spanking of Lois and Lana? What a great scene that would have been, and you could keep the dialogue exactly the same! :D
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Re: Threats and Missed Opportunities

Post by butch46163@yahoo.com »

THERES another group of females that shouldv'e gotten spanked and those are the bad girls of pulp comic and magazines.How could the writers and artists miss out on giving these bad girls villainesess and femme fatales their commeuppance.And boy how these women"s ample posteriors was in desperate need of roasting across the lap of a strong man. If she could punch; shoot, or kill a man then she should be woman enough to take her punishment via' a good hard tail blazing spanking :D So that us readers could felt that justice was finally done. :twisted:
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Missed Opportunities in Fantastic Four

Post by web-ed »

This subject came up recently over on the SpankingPanels.com forum, and since I was of course unable to keep my big mouth shut over there, I decided to repeat myself here, where I've only made 519 other posts :) (true, as of this date).

First, I should mention that there was a scene in Fantastic Four #38 (May, 1965) which was either a missed opportunity or perhaps an intended spanking that Stan Lee basically wrote out of the script. That one may be found in Comics Gallery 2 by following the link. [Note: I later decided that the Comics Code had censored Sue's spanking, requiring the panel to be redrawn and the lettering redone. See the page or my article on how the Code affected spanking in comics.]

But ten issues earlier, in FF #28, the X-Men's Marvel Girl also just barely escaped being spanked by The Thing!
Image

Years later, Roy Thomas had taken over the scripting (and editing) chores from Stan the Man, and once again Susan came within a hair's breadth of getting the OTK treatment she deserved - and her own husband gave his blessing to the spanking!
This scene is from FF #164:
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Unfortunately, Sue was able to get out of being spanked once again.
Last edited by web-ed on Sat Feb 28, 2015 12:00 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Add note that the spanking in FF #38 had been intended by Kirby and maybe Lee, but was censored by the Code.
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More Golden Age Missed Opportunities

Post by web-ed »

Four girls in romance comics who really needed the OTK treatment:

1. Lone Star Lou - there's really only one way to tame a girl like this, and we all know what it is! Unfortunately, no spanking for Lone Star Lou here.
"The Taming of Lone-Star Lou" in Cowgirl Romances #5.
"The Taming of Lone-Star Lou" in Cowgirl Romances #5.
cowgirl_romances_no_5.jpg (186.17 KiB) Viewed 11801 times
2. Another Wildcat - the title says, but still no spanking.
A real wildcat in Heart Throbs #32.
A real wildcat in Heart Throbs #32.
heart_throbs_no_32_p_3.jpg (169 KiB) Viewed 11801 times
3. A spoiled Hollywood actress tears up the set - this is getting annoying. Isn't there one real man out there who will do what needs to be done?
Another hellcat and spoiled Hollywood actress, from Love Confessions #9.
Another hellcat and spoiled Hollywood actress, from Love Confessions #9.
love_confessions_no_9_p_3.jpg (168.81 KiB) Viewed 11801 times
4. "I Misbehaved" - she even admits it! Spank her already, you idiots!
"I Misbehaved" - she even admits it!  From Teen-Age Romances #18.
"I Misbehaved" - she even admits it! From Teen-Age Romances #18.
teenage_romances_no_18_p_3.jpg (173.71 KiB) Viewed 11801 times
Then we have some missed opportunities that were largely positional rather than temperamental:

5. Feature Comics #116:
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Perky journeys to a land where the queen has made all the other women ugly. Opening a beauty salon, he tricks the queen, turning her ugly as well, and when she goes searching for the now-invisible Perky, she bends over, providing him with a tempting target indeed. Unfortunately, he has no paddle handy and gives her a swift kick instead.
Image

6. Feature Comics #55: There was a strip called Big Top featuring Butch the Clown. I can't tell you how many hideous M/M slapstick paddlings I found there (they're all documented in the Comics Spanking Data Base), but just this once, we almost got to enjoy a M/F paddling! Butch, on his day off, helps a young lady search for her missing compact. After suffering various tortures, he finds out the compact was in her purse all the time. And to top it off, instead of a kiss, she offers him a pass to - the circus, of all things! That settles it - somebody needs a paddling!
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I'd like to think she had to come down from that pole eventually, fanny-first, to meet Butch's paddle :) !

7. Feature Funnies #15: We've seen a couple of spankings in Dixie Dugan. This time, Dixie herself touches her toes when instructed to do so by a radio program, and without bending her knees, which is very important for good paddling. Alas, no one showed up with a paddle at the critical time :( .
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8. Torchy #4: There are few comics heroines we've wanted to see spanked more than Bill Ward's Torchy! This episode was as close as we ever got (as far as we know), with Torchy actually positioned over the knee of a surprised taxi cab passenger. I think I'd have acted reflexively and started to spank her immediately (at least that's the excuse I'd use at my trial), but this guy does nothing! :cry:
Image
Last edited by web-ed on Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:59 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: remove comma
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The Duel Over Superman

Post by web-ed »

Another missed opportunity from the Superman Family, this one is called "The Duel Over Superman". Written by Robert Bernstein and drawn by Kurt Schaffenberger, It has the look and feel of a Lois Lane story, but it's actually from Superman #150 (January 1962).

The plot, like many others during this era, is based on the rivalry between Lois Lane and Lana Lang. Now, Superman is not blameless here, because it wasn't fair of him not to make a clear choice between them or else tell them both he would never marry. This was one of the big flaws in the Superman mythos, the fault of editor Mort Weisinger, and the only attempt to explain Superman's conduct was made 24 years later by Alan Moore in "Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?" - the last (and last "imaginary") story that featured the Superman we had all known up to that time. However, let's put that aside and take a look at this particular story.

Lois comes up with a plan to make Superman choose between her and Lana: they will fake a deadly duel to the death, and to stop them from killing each other, Superman will choose one. Lana agrees, both girls figuring that he will choose her.
Image

Schaffenberger does a fine job with Lana's expression, making her look like the schemer she is, and this one panel alone is enough to make me want to see them both get the comeuppance they deserve. But let's continue: just as Lois and Lana planned, Jimmy Olsen alerts Superman to the "duel". Superman concludes, as he so often did, that "I've decided I must teach those two a lesson!"
Image

And this is where it gets really frustrating - time after time, Superman would declare that he needed to "teach a lesson" to Lois or Lana or both, but he never did so by the safe, certain, CSR-approved method of SPANKING! Instead, he builds two Lois and Lana robots!
Image

It's actually very peculiar that Superman changes to Clark Kent and assembles the robots in his apartment instead of in his Fortress of Solitude - if a neighbor had dropped in just then, he'd have had a hard time explaining what two half-dressed female robots were doing in his living room - and this is the only panel in the entire story in which he assumes his Clark identity. Of course this elaborate plan goes awry, and in the last panel, Superman concedes "my lesson backfired against me". Why didn't he learn that instead of these elaborate schemes, simple spankings would "teach a lesson" far more effectively? And come to think of it, the girls also unfairly dragged Jimmy into this mess, so he's entitled to a little satisfaction also and we could have had a nice Superman/Lana Jimmy/Lois double-spanking!
Image
Next time try spanking them, Supes!
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More Missed Opportunities in Lois Lane

Post by web-ed »

Here are three more examples, all of them taken from Lois Lane #28 (Oct. 1961)! First, Superman meets his great-great....great-granddaughter in the distant future, and she's inherited Lois' brattiness. The story makes no sense, but in the panel shown here (drawn by John Forte) she's using excessive super-speed and causing a problem because she wouldn't listen to Supes:
Image
Copyright DC Comics Inc.

When Supes caught up with her, he should have taken her right over his knee, the way a great-great....great-grandpappy should!

In the next story, Lois is teaching a class for reporters and has arranged a stage with multiple sets! The whole thing is bizarre: it's not young journalism students but seasoned reporters that Lois is supposedly teaching, and they shouldn't need any advice from her on how to do their jobs. And where on earth would the institution (whatever it is) get the money to construct a full-size revolving set??

Anyway, Lois here asks Jimmy to help her re-create a tight situation she once found herself in. You won't believe what she asks him to do:
Image
Copyright DC Comics Inc.

I think it's Lois who's been taking lessons - from Wonder Woman - and the subject was bondage :lol: ! "Jimmy Olsen, will you kindly tie me up?"

"Be glad to Lois, and then I'm going to give you a good spanking!" :D

The third example was titled "Lois Lane's Super-Lesson". Now as we, and all the Lois Lane readers who kept writing in on the subject, know full well, the only "Super-Lesson" Lois really needed was a Super-Spanking from Superman :) ! Needless to say, once again he pulls off a series of ridiculous and time-consuming stunts to humiliate her by setting her up with some fat Prince or other, instead of just taking her OTK and giving her what she deserved:
Image
Copyright DC Comics Inc.

What a waste of time! Well, I couldn't stand it any more, so despite possessing zero artistic talent, I've created a fake image to show what Superman should have done to Lois!!

Image
The way IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN!! :twisted:

For anyone with real artistic talent who would like to try doing a better fake than this (it won't be hard), here are links to the two images you can download and use: Lois in Spanking Position and
Superman Seated with Hand Raised (obviously you'll need to put Lois' image over those of the two super-tots just as I did).
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Sexual Innuendo in Lois Lane

Post by web-ed »

I could have added this to the previous post, but it's not really a case of a missed spanking opportunity. Of course this is purely unintentional, but you have to wonder how the editor missed this when it came across his desk:

Image
Copyright DC Comics Inc.
Forget about Lois' supposedly futuristic super-brain - that kind of silliness was always taking place in the "Superman Family" books - what really matters here is that it looks like an illicit rendezvous between Superman and Lois at a tacky Las Vegas motel! To make matters worse, the name of the place is the Lucky Lady Motel :lol: ! Yep, this is where guys take their gals when they want to "get lucky".

Oh, my :o !
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Two Unused Paddles in Wonder Woman

Post by web-ed »

There were a fair number of Holliday sorority girls paddlings in Wonder Woman, but there were also an interesting number of unused paddles and paddling references. Here are two of them:

In the first, from Wonder Woman #5, we see that guards in the women's prison on Mars are armed not with guns, but with paddles! Of course, there's also lots of bondage in evidence. You have to love the prisoners' "uniform" also. No paddling, though.
Image
Copyright DC Comics, Inc.

In the second, Wonder Woman is trying to get a depressed young woman named Gay to become happily integrated into society. How to do that? She turns Gay over to Etta Candy and her Holliday College girls! In this scene, Etta demands to know what secret wishes Gay has kept in her heart. Notice that Etta and the unnamed girl at right are both carrying paddles! (At least, Harry Peters' weird idea of what sorority paddles looked like). We may infer that these paddles had recently been applied to Gay's backside - now that's the way to cheer her up! :)
Image
Copyright DC Comics, Inc.

There's really nothing like Wonder Woman :D !
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Another Wacky Scene From Jimmy Olsen

Post by web-ed »

Worst of all the Superman Family comic books back in the Silver and Bronze Ages was Jimmy Olsen. I've recently been forced to go through a lot of back issues of this title as part of my search for The Holy Grail of comic-book spankings, finding only some really bad M/M stuff for my efforts. But there were definite possibilities, particularly where Lucy Lane (Lois' sister and Jimmy's sometime girlfriend during these years) was concerned.

Now Jimmy Olsen was certainly no prize catch as a boyfriend, but even so Lucy treats him rather badly. Let's see an example:
Image
Copyright DC Comics, Inc.

First of all, only DC would even think of printing a panel this goofy - Lucy wallops Jimmy with the arm of a female robot! Unprovoked physical violence like this is clearly grounds for a spanking, and Jimmy should have administered one on the spot. :)
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Another Wonder Woman Paddle Remark

Post by web-ed »

Here's one more, from Wonder Woman #8 (Spring 1944). It's pretty strange, but we've grown to expect that by now. Upon being issued a rifle, Etta Candy's first thought is that it would make a good paddle!
Image
Copyright DC Comics, Inc.

Major Steve Trevor takes the Holliday College girls with him into battle, so he issues them army rifles and steel helmets - what could be more natural? :)
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