A Tenth O.T. Katie Thread

[willjohn]

I have seen photos of Dodgy Dave always surrounded by women much taller than himself. He does resemble the common description of a leprechaun (or a spanko version of Charles Hawtrey from the "Carry on" films).

[solsunbeach]

All the people who work in the adult industries have alias names for social and financial reasons. Regarding the male actors in the spanking industry, they rarely get paid other than expenses. Amelia was known as Ariel Anderson, but this is also an alias and with reference to her height she is 6' 2 even without heels

[willjohn]

According to IMDB Amelia's real name is Jocelyn Brooke-Hamilton. She has appeared in a few mainstream films under that name.

[hugob00m]

btw... does anyone have anything to say about Katie and her late oil change?

[web-ed]

It is not really hard. We switched in the early 1970s. With everything in 10s and hundreds it is very simple. There was more confusion in 1966 when our currency changed from pounds, shillings and pence to dollars and cents. In the old system, there were 12 pence to the shillings and twenty shillings to the pound. Some of the upmarket shops gave prices in guineas. A guinea was one pound and one shillings. Ludicrous.

I don't know how land is surveyed in Australia, Willjohn, but one big problem with going metric in America is that our land divisions are based on the mile with small lots surveyed in feet (all legal descriptions of real property are measured this way). And in rural areas, streets are generally numbered relative to the county seat, with each 100 standing for one mile. It's really quite a good system as opposed to most of our cities, where the streets are named and each person has to remember what its number is, and it's usually (but not always) 800 to the mile. For example, in Chicago North Avenue is 1600 N and Fullerton Ave is 2400 N, and they are one mile apart. In a rural address, a road named "800 N" would run East-West 8 miles north of the zero point and as you travel along it eastward you would run into roads numbered "1200 W," "1100 W" etc. It's much easier. But note that even in the city, the mile remains an important unit and lots are commonly measured in acres, where 640 acres = one square mile.

There's really no practical way to switch all this from miles to kilometers, and given the speed of modern handheld calculators that have been around for 45 years now, there's no real need to switch, either. I personally hope we don't try to force a total metric conversion in America.

[willjohn]

Acres were replaced by hectares, miles by kilometers, yards by meters. The best way to calculate distances is an inch is 2.54 centimeters. There are 10 millimeters to the centimeter, 100 centimeters to the meter, 1000 meters to the kilometer.

A bottle of whisky is 700 milliliters, which is less than the 26 ounces it used to be. With everything in tens, hundreds and thousands it is a lot easier than 16 ounces to the pound, 8 pints the gallon, 14 pounds to the stone etc.

[willjohn]

btw... does anyone have anything to say about Katie and her late oil change?

A very stern motor mechanic. A very sore stern for Katie. I am sure she will keep up the regular grease and oil changes for her old car. Poor maintenance of vehicles can lead to cracked cylinder heads which eventually require a new engine. Katie may now get a twinge every 3 months to remind her of her car's need for maintenance.

[web-ed]

O.K., before anyone thinks he's logged in to the Civil Engineering Journal instead of Chicago Spanking Review, let's talk about Katie's Oil Change. [Note: I began writing this before Willjohn's post above.] This was a short one but a good one, and as a fan of classic cars I must side with "Otto McCanuck" (="Auto Mechanic" as I'm sure everyone realized) in his "explanation" to Katie of the dire consequences of neglecting regular oil changes. Take heart, Katie - a sore bottom is much better than worn-out engine bearings, and I'm sure CSR readers would rather see you get spanked than overhaul your engine, fun as the latter might be .

This was a good gag, and at least Katie didn't earn herself even more spanks by not wearing green for St. Patrick's Day. The ad was a nice touch, especially Katie's none-too-pleased expression, so all-in-all a nice treat for the holiday.

True story: I once saw a picture of the sign in front of an oil-change place that read, "If you love her, lube her". Perhaps the customers who might have been offended didn't understand the reference.

[willjohn]

i remember an old joke about heaven and hell. In Heaven the mechanics are German, the Police are English, the cooks are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is run by the Swiss.

In Hell, the mechanics are French, the Police are German, the cooks are English, the lovers are Swiss and everything is run by the Italians.

Is there anybody I did not offend?

[solsunbeach]

I can think of a number of mechanics who would be delighted to accept Katie's business

[willjohn]

......in the weird world of Katie where her arse pays all her bills (but not in a pornographic way).

[hugob00m]

Hi, WillJohn.

A very stern motor mechanic. A very sore stern for Katie. I am sure she will keep up the regular grease and oil changes for her old car. Poor maintenance of vehicles can lead to cracked cylinder heads which eventually require a new engine. Katie may now get a twinge every 3 months to remind her of her car's need for maintenance.

Yes! She wouldn't want to do any damage to that old Buick! (If I remember right, I think I based the drawing on a '53.) And, even if she's good with her car maintenance from now on, there will be other "reasons" (excuses!) to spank her.

[hugob00m]

Hi, Web-ed. Thanks for commenting.

O.K., before anyone thinks he's logged in to the Civil Engineering Journal instead of Chicago Spanking Review, let's talk about Katie's Oil Change. [Note: I began writing this before Willjohn's post above.] This was a short one but a good one,

I'm glad you liked it.

as a fan of classic cars I must side with "Otto McCanuck" (="Auto Mechanic" as I'm sure everyone realized) in his "explanation" to Katie of the dire consequences of neglecting regular oil changes.

That's true. I work for a store that sells car parts, and I know what the failure to change oil can do. (Katie actually got off easy with just a spanking!)

Take heart, Katie - a sore bottom is much better than worn-out engine bearings, and I'm sure CSR readers would rather see you get spanked than overhaul your engine, fun as the latter might be.

It would be a lot worse for her, and not really any fun for her fans to watch.

[hugob00m]

True story: I once saw a picture of the sign in front of an oil-change place that read, "If you love her, lube her". Perhaps the customers who might have been offended didn't understand the reference.

Makes sense... whichever way you take it.

[hugob00m]

Hi, Solsunbeach. Thanks for commenting.

I can think of a number of mechanics who would be delighted to accept Katie's business

Especially if they get to spank her for any kind of neglect she inflicts on her car.

[hugob00m]

i remember an old joke about heaven and hell. In Heaven the mechanics are German, the Police are English, the cooks are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is run by the Swiss.

In Hell, the mechanics are French, the Police are German, the cooks are English, the lovers are Swiss and everything is run by the Italians.

Is there anybody I did not offend?

It's a funny joke, although nowadays, I'm sure some people would be offended.

I've come to the conclusion that people who are easily offended are actually using it to manipulate those of us who DO have a conscience.

[willjohn]

It was around in the 1980s and I am fairly sure I first heard it from an Italian-Australian mechanic.

[hugob00m]

It was around in the 1980s and I am fairly sure I first heard it from an Italian-Australian mechanic.

Around that time, "Polack jokes" were making the rounds in the U.S. and the funniest ones were usually told to me by people of Polish ancestry.

I believe that the origin of the "Polack joke" was the ease with which they were conquered during WWII. In reality, it was not due to inferior intelligence, but an ill-equipped military and a lack of natural boundaries. Poland is most likely Putin's next target if he's not stopped in Ukraine.

[butch46163@yahoo.com]

Great story from beginning to end this have a tv ad vibe to it telling what should happen to pretty women that don`t take care of their cars

[hugob00m]

Hi, Butch. Thanks for your comment.

Great story from beginning to end this have a tv ad vibe to it telling what should happen to pretty women that don`t take care of their cars

I'm glad you like this story. And your idea for a T.V. ad is a good one. I've got some other stuff in progress right now, but I'm thinking I might do the T.V. ad some time in the future.