With careful and detailed analysis, we now understand all the essentials of spanking: that spankos are divided into Natural and Learned, that the Theory of the Transformative Event (TE) explains the most difficult questions (how Natural Spankos of all orientations are created), and of course that the nature of spanking itself is a violation of the spankee's person which is felt emotionally as humiliation. We have explained why the use of certain implements and positions is desired, but not all of them, nor have we covered why certain ancillary behaviors such as the use of particular words and phrases, counting, etc. can be so important to both Tops and Subs. At first it might seem a fruitless quest: can these myriad variations not be simply explained by the great variety of human nature itself, as for example why some people like a particular food item and others don't? It is not until we consider carefully why these ancillary behaviors, or Spanking Embellishments as we shall call them, have an appeal at all that we realize the spankee who wants to count the swats and the spanker who wants her to arch her back are in fact seeking exactly the same thing.
There are basically two goals that spanker and spankee are trying to achieve to enhance their enjoyment of the spanking session, and the particular means chosen to achieve these specific goals are examples of the class of Spanking Embellishments. Let's begin with the simpler of the two goals, comfort during the session.
Implements and Positions Revisited With an Eye Toward Comfort
We have already seen (in Chapters 3 & 4) that a primary or secondary TE may leave the spanko with a desire for a particular implement or position, the classic examples being the child who is spanked by hand OTK leaving her with the desire to re-create OTK hand spanking later in life, and school corporal punishment which leaves the spanko with an interest in a bending-over position and/or the wooden paddle or rattan cane. But this does not explain all interest in these things, nor does it explain why people would like the leather paddle or the riding crop, which with their kinky overtones are never used for spanking either at home or in the school, thus cannot be part of the original TE. The answer lies in the fact that while the TE explains why some adults become Natural spankos, a certain amount of exploration naturally takes place within adult spanking as with other paraphilias, and an obvious factor in determining spanking preferences is sensuality, broadly understood as what the spankee finds comfortable and the spanker finds congenial. And this is even more true when we deal with Learned spankos, who come fully into their spanking desires only through adult expermentation.
The example of the leather paddle makes this clear. Leather has some advantages over wood and other solid materials, having a little more "give" and, provided it isn't too heavy, less tendency to bruise. Therefore it is easy to see how both Top and Sub could adopt this implement, even if either or both of them are Natural spankos. Experimenting with positions is also a very natural thing for spankos to do, although with Natural spankos a preference for the particular position(s) used during the primary and secondary TE's will generally remain strong. Some positions will be more comfortable than others for a given Sub. Thus some women do learn to enjoy bending over for the wooden paddle or even the cane despite this not being part of their early spanking fantasies.
Other leather implements might come to be preferred for the same reason, although we must never forget that if the strap or belt were used during the primary or secondary TE, the preference for them is more likely due to that fact rather than the relative comfort of these implements (in lighter weights, of course).
Increasing the Spankee's Humiliation
In the second class of cases a given spanking preference is not sought as a means to achieve greater comfort but because it increases the spankee's humiliation. This is the more complicated and interesting of the two subsidiary spanking goals. To see how it comes about, recall what we learned back in Chapter 1: spanking is a violation of the spankee's private space which is felt emotionally as humiliation. That humiliation may be an end in itself or it may lead to other feelings (such as submission), but in any case it will be seen that both spanker and spankee will seek to increase the violation and humiliation of the spankee to enhance the spanking experience. Let us now list the common ways this can be done:
- Baring the Bottom - so obvious it's easy to overlook. Baring the bottom has always been more about humiliating the spankee than anything else, although it is certainly practical as it helps the spanker judge the progress of the spanking and wind it up if, for instance, the spankee is beginning to bruise. Notice that getting it "on the bare" is the almost universal desire among spankees, even though many also dread it at the same time. This is because baring the bottom is more unambiguously humiliating than, say, having to count the swats.
- Position - some positions or variations will be seen as more humiliating than others. Even the trusty OTK position may be perceived this way, and obviously something like touching toes with feet wide apart could qualify because it leaves the spankee totally exposed. As to other variations, I think the best example comes from the bending-over group of positions where the spankee is required to arch her back, thus turning up the rear end and presenting it for the spanker's paddle or cane. Yes, this embellishment is certainly practical in that it provides the best possible target, but making the spankee "stick it out" is first and foremost an excellent way of increasing her humiliation. This procedure is discussed fully in How to Paddle, Strap, and Cane. Position is also the reason why certain phrases resonate so deeply for some Subs: "Bend over," "Look up," etc. Having to address the spanker as "Sir" or "Ma'am" might fall into this category or it might be more due to going directly to the spankee's submission and subordinate status.
- Counting the Swats and/or Saying "Thank you" - This works by forcing the spankee to concentrate on the swats (counting) or acknowleging the spanker's superior status (saying "Thank you"). In both cases the spankee is acknowledging that she's being spanked, which is or can be a humiliating admission. But notice that this is not as universal as baring the bottom is, which is why some spankees love it and others really hate it.
- High Intensity - Up to a certain point, increasing the intensity (stinging) of the swat or stroke increases the violation and hence the humiliation. This is why there is so much anticipation on the part of both spanker and spankee when a hard swat is on the way. This is the appeal of both hard paddle swats and, I believe, "British style" caning in which the strokes are delivered about as hard as a spankee can handle (not, of course, as hard as the spanker can give them). The limiting factor here is the spankee's Tolerance Limit, beyond which the returns diminish as the spankee hates and/or fears the level of intensity and the spanker feels guilty (or should) for going over the boundary line.
- Long, Thorough Spankings - The basic purpose here is the same as counting: it makes the spankee admit to herself that the spanking is really happening and that control has been taken away from her - in other words, she is forced to submit and to admit the humiliating reality of having her bottom warmed. The mechanism is part physical and part psychological, brought about by the cumulative effect of receiving a large number of swats or strokes. Physically, the derriere becomes sore and increasingly sensitive (after a period of decreasing sensitivity during the warm-up); psychologically there is an analogous effect from the repeated violations of the spankee's person.
- The Spanker Having Fun and "Rubbing it In" - This only applies to certain types of sessions, and in particular non-disciplinary ones (in a disciplinary session the spankee usually wants the spanker to be very serious and "all business"). The spanker might say things like "Felt that one, I see" or "Your bottom is getting so red." The mechanism here is that the spanker deriving obvious enjoyment from the spankee's discomfiture "rubs it in" and increases her humiliation.
- Having Witnesses Observe the Spanking - Outside of spanking parties this is rare. I include it here because even though it almost never occurs in practice, it is a very common fantasy for women. You can see this in the spanking art of Eve and SP Anka, where the female spankee is further humiliated by knowing that other people, particularly males, are seeing her bare bottom and watching it turn bright red! Because the sense of embarrassment is so acute, few women are actually willing to have their spankings take place in a public setting; nonetheless, the increase in humiliation (and perhaps attention) is the basis for the fantasy.
- Rubbing the Bottom - This is an obviously intimate contact which says, in effect, "This belongs to me right now." When the hand is used for this purpose, there is obviously a sensual aspect as well, and one that is usually appreciated by the female sub. A variation on this occurs when an implement is used and the spanker positions it on the spankee's bottom before administering some or even all of the strokes. The preliminary touch of the paddle or cane functions as a mini-violation of the spankee which portends the major violation to come, and also increases the spankee's embarrassment by making her aware that the spanker is carefully aiming for the target, which means he's looking at her soon-to-be-swatted rear end.
What's the simplest way to make the spankee's humiliation more acute? Bare her bottom! Oh, the shame - most women are terribly embarrassed to know that a man can see her bare bottom, especially when he's about to spank her. (Photo courtesy of Firm Hand Productions - click on it to be taken to their website).
How can you multiply the spankee's humiliation a dozen-fold? Paula Meadows answers the question by putting herself (for the subject here is plainly modeled on her) onstage in front of both a live and television(!) audience, bending all the way over in high heels, feet spread wide apart, and bottom bare so the audience can see everything! In effect, items (1), (2), (4), and (7) above are being combined into one scene. Many women might fantasize about this, but very few would ever consider actually revealing themselves in public this way (click to be taken to the Gallery page where we discuss this drawing in a little more detail).
It should be emphasized again that what are being discussed here as "embellishments" are simple spanking session behaviors that can not be explained by the desire to recreate some particular physical or psychological aspect of the TE (other than the violation/humiliation that is the center of the spanking experience). Thus role play, for example, is not an embellishment since it is a complex (not simple) pattern of behavior that results from wanting to act out a spanking fantasy (e.g. paddled by teacher) that was either part of a TE or else is a manifestation of trying to re-create some psychological aspect of that TE. An example of this latter type would be the Employer/Employee spanking, which seldom takes place in real life but is popular because it re-creates the feeling of compulsion the spankee had as a child when she had no choice but to submit to the spanking. The Sub feels that she must submit to being spanked by her "employer" since he represents authority to whom obedience is due, while the Top enjoys the feeling of power over the "employee" and compelling her to submit. More generally, the Top dressing for power (as a man wearing a business suit) is a means of assuming the mantle of authority, and is a combination of making the spankee feel compelled to submit and also reassuring the spankee that it is all right to submit to him (that is, as a strong, capable man and not someone unworthy of her submission). Again, this is not an "embellishment" as we have used the term here.
What about combining spanking with other paraphilias, such as bondage or wearing leather/latex outfits? Where does this fit in? Are these things "embellishments"?
That is a difficult question, but the answer appears to be "no". The appeal of bondage is obvious, or should be to anyone who was paying attention to earlier chapters: the Top dominates the Sub by restraining her, while she in turn feels that she is being "forced" to submit to the Top, which makes it all right (remember that women always need to feel that it is "all right" for them to submit to a man, even though it is what they secretly want to do, to maintain their sense of personal dignity and self-worth). Leather and latex have a somewhat different appeal; they are sexy (at least to some) in the way clothing can be, and suggestive of erotic adventures perhaps because they are seldom worn outside a strictly sexual context. Thus bondage could enhance the pure D/S aspect of M/F spanking. But even if so, this would not be an embellishment as we are using the term since domination/submission are "downstream" of humiliation (that is, humiliation precedes the Sub's submission and the Top's domination). This might seem an overly-fine distinction, but remember that emotions during a spanking may or may not go past the point of humiliation, and even if they do, they may or may not include dominance/submission. They do go all the way to D/S in what we might call the most important case, M/F erotic spanking, but we must not neglect the other cases in our study of all things spanking.
Click on the image to be taken to the page in Comics Gallery 2 where it is discussed in more detail.
Wonder Woman was notorious for combining bondage with spanking as seen here, but this does not constitute an embellishment of spanking as we use the term. We'd guess that of the two, bondage was the more important to her creator Charles Moulton (William Moulton Marston), but at least he placed some value on spanking.
(Click to triple-size).
Some people like to combine leather and spanking, but the leather outfit is not an embellishment. It is rather the combination of two separate paraphilias, leather fetishism and spanking. For many, it isn't the leather outfit but rather the bending-over position which would make them think about spanking this young lady.
In these examples, then, what we have is simply the combination of two or more actualizations of multiple paraphilias by those who have more than one. This explains the appeal of the leather-clad dominatrix to the male Sub. It also helps explain a subject we haven't gotten into until now: erotic same-sex spanking, which is a combination of the two paraphilias, homosexuality and spanking. (We did cover non-erotic M/M and F/F spanking in Chapter 1). And how do multiple paraphilias develop? Extending the ideas of earlier chapters, it is fairly evident that either multiple TE's are involved or that Natural and Learned paraphilias develop separately, e.g. a TE produces homosexuality (Natural) on top of which the person learns to appreciate spanking (Learned).
We're not going to delve further into erotic same-sex spanking in this study, being content to have laid the necessary groundwork for anyone who might wish to take up the question.
