Chicago Spanking Review Special Presentation

The Humorama Spanking Verses!

The very first entry in our Humorama Series, Snappy Spanking Verse, introduced CSR readers to editor Abe Goodman's habit of occasionally filling a page or two with some spanking-themed humorous verse. These were almost certainly written by Goodman himself, and functioned as filler material (Goodman had to fill 100 pages in each of 4 - 6 digests per month) as well as presumably allowing him to supplement his income. We also placed many of the examples we're going to see here on the CSR Bulletin Board. The main reason we decided to do this page in addition was because we can control the layout better here. The most interesting thing about this habit of Goodman's to us spankos is that it reveals he enjoyed spanking material. That doesn't mean he was a true spanko himself, although the prose more than the poetry suggests that he was - but it does mean he had an appreciation for the humorous and sexy possibilities of this form. We'll probably never know if it was he who suggested to Bill Wenzel that he do the first spanking cartoon back in 1955 or whether Wenzel with his fertile mind conceived of the "spanker" on his own.

The importance of this fact cannot be overstated: Goodman bought at least 165 "spankers" from some of the best cartoonists of the day, leaving behind a legacy of spanking material that spankos have been enjoying now for fifty-seven years (as of 2012). Dan Rivera collected them when he could; Mike was clipping them out of various digests all through the 60's; and we ourselves were strongly influenced by the reprinted versions we first encountered in the late 70's and early 80's, later obtaining others from the internet, from Mike's collection in 2010, and finally from some of the original digests ourselves in 2011 - 2012 in our desire to obtain a complete understanding of the Humorama years, not to mention a complete (if possible) collection of these wonderful spanking cartoons.

What a difference an editor can make! Had someone other than Goodman been editing the Humorama line, the "spanker" might never have gotten off the ground and the world would be immeasurably poorer. Conversely, imagine what the Superman Family of comic books might have been like had Goodman been their editor in place of Mort Weisinger: we'll bet Lois Lane and Supergirl both would have gotten their just desserts, and probably more than once!

Here then are some examples of Abe Goodman's spanking verses. Not poetic masterpieces, they are nonetheless celebrations of the activity which is near and dear to us. As we will see, Goodman sometimes combined short verses on the same page as an unrelated cartoon, and used longer ones instead of silly jokes on the pin-up pages.

From Breezy, August 1959.Posted by the Web-Ed on 02/10/2012 (click to double-size).

My boyfriend loves to spank
So when I pull a prank
I'm flopped over his knee in position--
For a time I can't sit
Though I'm forced to admit
It keeps me in the pink of condition!

From Eye, June 1960. Click to double-size.

A model named Jasmine (no last name given) adorns the next verse:

"I was spanked by my dad any time I was bad,
And I certainly got my full share --
I would be firmly tanned right where Nature had planned
And the place was most generally bare.
And I'm spanked yet today in the very same way,
With my boyfriend performing the chore --
He seems perfectly sure it's the very best cure
So he spanks me when I make him sore.
Once he gets a good start he can sure make me smart
A lot worse than the spankings Dad gave --
'Though I can't understand why I only get tanned
When I've made up my mind to behave!"

From Stare, October 1954. Click to double-size.

The presence of Marla Vernay accompanied this example from October 1954, titled "Advice to the Loveworn". Interestingly, this was nine months prior to the first real "spanker":

One part to hug,
One part to kiss,
One part to pat,
But heed to this:
If she is cursed
With temper rank,
The part you pat
You also spank!

Reminds us a little of The Taming of the Shrew, although Shakespeare's poetry was better.