Chicago Spanking Review

Clark Spanks Lois Lane #1

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Regular CSR readers should recognize this one. Resident Artist Hugob00m did it almost exactly two years ago at a time we were presenting another Superman Family mini-series and the subject of not enough M/F material came up on the Weekly Updates forum. B00m wanted to help out, so he did this very nice piece with Clark (Superman) Kent spanking Lois Lane and provided the following explanation of why he had Superman deliver Lois's punishment in his Kent identity:

"In response to the excuse that the DC publishers used [see The Lois Lane Spanking Letters - Web-Ed], saying that Superman was so strong that he might do serious damage to Lois if he were to ever strike her, I offer this alternative! As Clark Kent, Superman had spent years conditioning himself not to use more strength than a normal man was capable of. I don't have a full story for this, but I think it would work as an alternate ending to any of several of the published Superman's Girlfriend, Lois Lane stories!"

We think B00m's explanation is convincing, and it's a pity that Mort Weisinger at DC never thought of it. In fact, we believe that prior to B00m's drawing only one other artist had ever thought of Superman spanking Lois as Kent, and even he (we'll see his version next time) didn't consider using the Kent identity as a safety factor.

clark spanks lois by hugob00m

At last - Clark spanks Lois! Art by Hugob00m. © DC Comics Inc. Posted by the Web-Ed on 08/04/2017.

There's another reason why Superman spanking Lois as Clark Kent is such a good idea, and it goes back to part of the basis of the character's original appeal: Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster set up the Superman comics with his meek and mild alter-ego Kent being despised by Lois, who desires him only as Superman. Adolescent boys were likely to identify with "Kent's" problem: "If only she knew the real me, I could have her!"

No, this is not an especially mature perspective, but then most Superman readers were adolescent or pre-adolscent boys, and Siegel and Shuster themselves were barely out of adolescence at the time (1938).

Kent's meekness, therefore, was a vital part of what made Superman work, and when John Byrne removed it as part of the Superman reboot in 1986, something was definitely lost as noted by critics at the time (e.g. R. Fiore in The Comics Journal, if we remember correctly after all these years). And we should expect that his sexual frustration at getting nowhere with Lois would eventually find expression through giving her the spanking her fickleness, lack of discernment, and general bitchiness deserved!

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