Chicago Spanking Review

Weird Spankings #17: Captain Marvel Spanks Midgets

Cover of Whiz Comics #32 (July 1942). Published by Fawcett.

Based on our experiences with Rockman, Captain Future, and Plastic Man, it seems fair to say that there was something about diminutive bad guys that made comic-book writers of the 1940's want to spank them. That's why when we saw this cover to Whiz Comics #32 we got a bad feeling in the pit of our stomach. Oh, no - not more midget spanking!

Yes - more midget spanking. O.K., technically they're not midgets - they're trolls dressed as if they were dwarves, but we're just going to go ahead and call them midgets and hope we don't get a lot of nasty mail accusing us of being ignorant for not knowing the difference between midgets, trolls, dwarves, and smurfs.

Now let's get back to our "story", which as it happens is an allegory. Two troublemakers, Adolf-Puss and Blabbermouth Musso (Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini, in case you didn't recognize them) have caused a war in the land of the trolls. The verdict: guilty! Captain Marvel declares, "I pronounce and execute sentence here and now!" We could go on about how this trivializes the war, or how we wish the bad guys had been bad girls, etc. but we've said all that before, and it didn't help (sigh). This is almost like all those Capt. Marvel Jr. Nazi spankings, which brings us to our final episode (for now) with CM Jr. ...